Reply To Olga

Hello my petite chapeau!

You sent me a lovely photos of you with a big horkin soda. I love
soda and it is
such a coincidence that you have included a photo of you with a soda
as big as your head!
(not actually as big as your head. your head is not as thin and does
not have a straw, though that would be convenient for a zombie. (i
make a joke (not a good one) ) )

You aksed about my interests! You naughty child, you will now get,
as they say here "an earful", ass I do love talking about my hobbies.

I may have mentioned, my success in the stock market a few years
ago, in addition to the hefty life insurance settlement from my
departed wife's death last year (exploded colon, remember?), has
left me with ampule time to persue my dream: Becoming a world class
archer.

(archery is what we do with bows and arrows... like cupid! the
little imp of love!)

I also love playing golf, but I am more of an archer than a golfer.

I've included a photo of me with my zen archery guide and houseboy,
Kwan, as I train for a tournament here in Florida USA: Seat of the
Infidels!











I've also included a photo of my best friend, Terrence "Hopalong"
Provenza, playing golf. Terrence, you may have noticed, lost his
leg. (More about this later, if you're at all interested. I find
the tale, which involved a kiln and a lady of the evening from
Bangkok, a bit sordid, but you may enjoy these things (wink, wink,
wink).)













In addition to archery and golf, I think I have mentioned my main
love: My cats: Mister Snickers and JoJo the Dancing Clown.

They are my two best fiends in the world and took care of my heart
and scrotum when I learned of my wife's tragic departure.

I do miss her... You bare a striking resemblance to her when she
was younger. Of course, I would never be so presumptuous (a big
word for your sister, eh?) as to place any interest on your part
onan old man like me. I'm 54 and hope to retire with on one of my
properties here in Florida soon, though I do have some condominiums
in Northern California and Texas, ass well.

You mentioned marriage. Gee willickers. After seeing your photo, that
would be something. I'm enclosing a photo of myself. It is from when my
favorite feline, Mister Snickers, and I won top prize in a cat show!
As I mentioned, I have two cats, Mister Snickers and JoJo The Dancing
Clown. Mister Snickers is something of a show-off and she (yes, "she",
do not ask at this juncture why he is named as a she. It has to do
with my relationship with my mother).

You may be able to make out the reflection of my lovely, departed
bride, Bernesta.
This is the last photo of her, as it were.



I have digressed: I am so lonely here in Florida with just me and the cats and
Kwan, that a new bride would be lovely. The difficulty here in the United
States for me is that most of the women I meat are purely interested in my
money. I know that I am not the most attractive man and could stand to
lose a few pounds (or kilograms or stone), but I am a tender and attentive
lover and an all around good egg.

Hoping all is swell with you, lovely one.

(there! i've come out and said it! YOU'RE LOVELY! please forgive!)

yours vicefully,

Robert Betrug

Reply From Olga

I received a reply from "Olga"



Hi my friend Robert!
I'm glad so much to receive your answer again! It's very interesting
for me to read your messages, from them we are learning more about
ourself, and I begin know more about you, Robert.
My dear friend, of course, may be you want learn about our
correspondence, about correspondence's essence too, really? As I want
to tell that I have decided to get acquainted through an Internet due
of my girlfriend Natasha which one year back has gotten acquainted with
the foreigner German Frank, I have said you about this earlier.
Robert, may be, possible, we will together in the future time, may
be I would like to look the marriage too, if you will want this, I
don't want to hide this so important fact, but we must to learn more
things about each other more and more, it will reasonably and
correctly, really, Robert? I hope that you will agree with me with
this fact too. Please, tell me about this, ok? But in my opinion,
again and again, we must learn about each other more and more, I
repeat this! Please, agree with me, Robert!
My dearest friend Robert, I would like to tell you about my family. I
want to say to you that I have a large family too. This are my mom
Marina, my daddy Pavel too. Also I have two sisters. They are Katya and
Masha. My sister Katya is 21 years old. But Masha is smaller sister
between me and Katya too, Masha is 10 years old.
On professions my mom is a seller in the shop, and my dad is an
engineer on the factory. My sister Katya is a student of the
university, she is studing on the lawyer, and Masha is a schoolgirl.
Our family are living without any conflicts too, we have a good
understanding between our members of our family. Because, I think that
our parents gave to us a good education. I think that it's so good and
I'm so proud that we have my mom and my daddy. Also I want to say to
you that I live with my family in one apartment.
Also I want to tell that I have consulted with my parents about the
account my acquaintances with you through the Internet, they have
estimated it as positively because they care about my future life of
course. My parents would want that I have a happy life, and would want
that I will find my man. As I told you earlier, I have never been
married.
As already I spoke to you earlier, I work as a waiter in the bar here
in Samara City. It's a perfect and cosy bar. My job is very pleasant
for me, people in our city are kind, and visitors of the cafe are not
roughness to us, certainly there are cases when the visitors are not
correct with us and spoil mood, but it happens very seldom. I'm very
interested to learn about your work, Robert, and what do you do in
free from work time?
During our weekends, in my free time, we are with my girlfriends, also
with Frank and Natasha sometime, go for a walk to the city, we like to
sit in cafe too for a cup of tea. I like my girlfriends very much,
especially my best girlfriend Natasha. She is as native sister for me!
By the way I want to say to you that Natasha works as a waiter in our
bar. Also I want to say to you that Natasha and Frank are living in
Samara City now. Natasha have visited Frank to Germany at last time,
Frank asked Natasha to visit in Germany him after that when they have
understood that they love each other. I remember, Natasha was so happy
in this time. They lived together during two month in Germany. And
then they have came to Russia, to Samara City too, simply,Natasha
said to Frank that she have missed about her parents, and that she
want to visit on some time her parents, and they came to Samara from
Germany. They are very happy together, they love each other very much,
I envy to Natasha and Frank slightly :) and also, of course, we meet
with each other sometimes and spend a lot of time together. We are so
good friends! Also I want to say to you that I have never been outside
of Russia, I have never been in an other countries, but I would like
to travel at once, it's so romantical, I think :)
Well, Robert, I must to finish my e-mail to you, I hope that we will
continue to correspond with each other and you will tell me much more
about yourself, and I will try to tell about myself as more as
possible in future e-mails. I want to ask you about more things,
Robert, and I hope that you will understand my questions and will
answer me for them. I want to learn more about your country, please,
tell me about your family, about your friends. A great hello to you
from my family, my friends Natasha and Frank too. I hope to see your
message soon. Bye-bye...
GOD BLESS YOU,
YOUR RUSSIAN FRIEND,
Olga!

Lottery Scam

I'm hoping that all of these are going to converge in some wonderful manner.

We shall see...


From: Robert Betrug
Reply-To: Robert Betrug
To: GLOBAL CREDIT UNION HOME


HI TOMMY! At the end of the document there is a question:

"Does your mail provider give you FREE antivirus protection?"

AM I SUPPOSED TO ANSWER THIS? BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW!!! WILL THIS
INTERFERE WITH MY WINNINGS?!?!?!?!?!


On 9/23/05, GLOBAL CREDIT UNION HOME
<info_globalcreditunionhome@yahoo.co.uk> wrote:


GLOBAL FINANCIAL SERVICES. U.K
(REGIONAL HEADQUARTERS)
IDENTIFICATION CLAIMING CERTIFICATE
TEL: + 44-703-184-7246, + 44-7031-847-278

FAX NUMBER: +447092871461
E-MAIL: info_global_credit_home_london@yahoo.co.uk

ATTENTION Robert Betrug,

FUND TRANSFER APPLICATION FORM

Applicant is required to read carefully this form and complete it
accordingly with the authentic information as may required and should be
returned for authentication immediately.

NAME: ROBERT BETRUG
DATE OF BIRTH: 9/31/52
NATIONALITY: UNITED STATES AMERICAN
OFFICE ADDRESS: MAGNOLIA BLVD

TEL 323 927 1764
FAX: SAME
EMAIL: (i put the email address i'm using for the scammer here)
OCCUPATION: RETIRED INVESTMENT BANKER
EMPLOYER: ME! (formerly. now i yam retired *see above* )

EMPLOYER ADDRESS: I ALREADY TOLD YOU I'M RETIRED!!! SHEESH!
APPLICANT BANK NAME: GLOBAL FINANCIAL SERVICES?
BANK ADDRESS: I DON'T KNOW!!! IT'S YOUR BANK!

ACCOUNT NUMBER: IF I CAN PICK ONE I'D LIKE IT TO BE
594058034809834095809834098503

9480983049809834098029902-0430---599--3
(that's my lucky number!)

SHIFT CODE: WHAT IN THE SAM HILL IS A SHIFT CODE, TOMMY?!?!!

APPLICANT IS REQUIRED TO PROVIDE WITH AN AUTHENTIC WITHNESS WHOS
INFORMATION SHOULD BE TAKEN IN THE FOLLOWING COLUMM.


(here's the situation: my lovely wife, BERNESTA, died last year of an
exploded colon leaving me with no one except my two lovely cats,
Mister Snickers and JoJo the Dancing Clown and my houseboy, Kwan
Achealeannoaneabergsteinowitz (he's from the phillipines).

is it okay if I use Mister Snickers' pawprint as a witness? He is a
faithful companion, but I do understand that there may be a problem
using a feline. (remind me to tell you the story about taking mister
snickers to the federal building to pose in my passport photo with
me!!! you'll poop yourself, tommy!)

The problem with using Kwan (as a witness, that is) is that

a. his hands are often occupied (wink!)
b. his "legality" in this country is somewhat suspect
3. he can't type. at all. we've tried.

Neither Mister Snickers nor Kwan have passports, either.

Please advise so we can finalass this deal and I can get my winnings
and help out my friend, Ibrahim Abacha, in Nigeria. I've already sent
him $1800 US and it seems that he needs some more!

(perhaps Ibrahim Abacha could be the witness!)

NAME:…………………………………………………………………………

POSTAL ADDRESS: ………………………………………………………………………

TELEPHONE NUMBER:…………………FAXNUMBER:………………………………

NATIONALITY:……………………PASSPORT NUMBER:…………………………



FOR OFFICE USE ONLY


NAME OF INSPECTING OFFICER:…………………………………………………………

VALUE INSPECTION……………………………………………………………………………



FUND SHOULD BE RELEASE TO BENEFICIARY AS SOON AS THE BENEFICIARY
COMPLIES FULLY WITH THE RULE AND REGULATION LAW OF INTERNATIONAL
MONITORY FUND.


BESTY REGARDS.

MR. TOMMY EDWARDS
GLOBAL FINANCIAL SERVICES. U.K

________________________________
Does your mail provider give you FREE antivirus protection?

I DON'T KNOW AND THERE'S NO WAY TO FIND OUT!!!!

Get Yahoo! Mail

OKAY. NOW WHAT?

My Russian Delight!!

Hello Ekaterina my dear.

What a banana pancake tragedy that you have encountered. It is, perhaps, kismet that i received your corasspondence as my wife of 10 years, Bernesta, died last year of an exploded colon, leaving me with only my kitty kat companions, mister snickers and jojo the dancing clown to share my wealth with here in sunny florida, u.s.a.

I stay here in Florida as i no longer enjoy my buildings in new york city. having since retired from the stock market, where i made my fortune, bernesta, my exploding coloned deceased wife, and i moved here. one of our other cats, Trina Little Kitty Clitty, didn't survive the move, though it wasn't her exploding colon. it was her head being closed in the door of the moving van.

sadness. a pause.

what do you need from me?

I've attached a photo of my favorite cat, Mister Snickers. He is a naughty pussy.

Maybe we can talk upon the phone.

Lonely Yours,
Dean Cameron


From: Ekaterina
Date: September 14, 2005 2:26:33 PM PDT
To: dean cameron
Subject: Hello!

Hello!!!


How are you doing? I have found your email in Internet and decided write to you. My name is Ekaterina. I am 27 years old. Live in Russia,city Kirov. I am cheerful woman, for an entertainment like to do many things as sports meets, a camping, go to the cinema, theatre etc. In a word I like to do all that all people. I work in marketing structure
on sale of cosmetics Oriflame.

I have good life here. I not the rich woman, but can provide myself. I like to travel. I travelled to many countries. Never was in the USA, but I think that this good place tolive and be happy. I know the English language well enough. I began to study professional English language several months ago and I do successes every day. Several months ago I started process of registration of the visa to travel in the USA. Now my visa is made practically out and in 2-4 days I can travel in the USA. I have received holiday from work till November, 20 and now I have a freetime.

I can take trip to some countries, but as the visa to visiting the USA already practically in my hands I prefer to take trip to theUSA. It is interesting to me look what life there. Now I am in Moscow and I wait reception of the visa. I could fly in the USA in some days,but there is a problem which stops me. I planned to fly in the USA together with my girlfriend, but unfortunately her plans for trip in USA have changed and now I do not know what to do. A problem in that that I cannot fly in the USA because I know nobody in your country. I cannot fly to the country where I know nobody and consequently I have decided to write to you the letter.

Possible It will be sounds silly but if you are interested a meeting with the nice woman, I shall like to meet you sometime soon! I never got acquainted through the Internet before but as my girlfriend cannot go in the USA together with me I decided to find the man which is interested in a meeting with the girl from Russia. I do not know your ideas about my letter, but it would be fine if we could meet and have some weeks together. On my trip I want to receive rest from my work and a life in Russia.

Also the basic purpose for the future is search correct men for serious attitudes which go to a marriage. I have no children, but I want to have children in the future. I the mature woman also am ready to creation of family with correct the man. I do not know what you really search in the future but if we could meet I shall be happy to discuss with you more about our meeting. Please, write what your purposes and plans for the future? What you search in a life? What are you going to do this autumn?

It would be fine if we could meet, do friendship or more than simply friendship. I shall be happy if you also have a free time and we could meet soon. I do not know your interests, but anyhow write to me back and I shall tell to you more about myself. Write to me all that you want. Probably we have similar plans and the purposes for the future and it will be interesting to us together.


I have easy character and you can write all that you want. Ask any questions which interest you. Write back and I shall tell more about myself and I shall send some my photos.

Please write to me back.




Have a good day,
Ekaterina

the russian bride spam scam scam

In my quest to return to edinburgh next year with a bigger and better show, I am trying to get a correspondence going with a "russian bride" scammer.

I had one happening but it seems "she" got wise to me.

Let's see if this one hangs on.

Her posts will be in italics